I was asked the other day who my least favourite superhero was. Though I prefer to keep this a positive space, I figured looking at some heroes who are real head-scratchers could be good for a laugh or two.
Here are a couple of “heroes” that were in the running for top spot on my list:
- Matter Eater Lad – His super power was the ability to eat anything…plus his name is pretty terrible.
- Vibe – A break dancing superhero who could create shockwaves actually joined the Justice League, but spent more time hitting on women and dancing than doing anything of merit.
- Almighty Dollar – He could shoot pennies from his wrist. He would have been better off collecting his pennies and giving them to charity…plus his name was J. Pennington Pennypacker and he was an accountant.
Now those all sound pretty bad, but an entire team of superheroes actually take the cake, in my humble opinion. My pick for least favourite superhero goes to the Great Lakes Avengers.
*I would like to preface this by saying John Byrne is one of my favourite comic book artists and writers of all time. His work on X-Men was legendary, I loved his run on Namor and Alpha Flight will always hold a special place in my heart (even though he was not particularly proud of that title).
The great John Byrne created the Great Lakes Avengers back in 1989. I think all four long-standing members of the team should make any top ten list for less-than-super heroes.
The team’s leader was Mister Immortal
As his name suggests, he simply could not die. If he got really, really hurt…he just stayed really, really hurt. However, once he actually died he instantly resurrected himself. The problem was, once he came back to life he was brain addled for a while and had to be held down by his teammates until he regained his senses. Other than that, he was a slightly above average hand-to-hand fighter and acrobat.
Second in command was Flat Man
Flat man was…well…a flat man. He was basically a two-dimensional version of Mr. Fantastic (though he was not nearly as smart and possessed far fewer cool tricks). He could stretch, fit under doorways and appear invisible if you looked at him at the exact perfect angle. He also had a vast knowledge of fashion and accounting…so he had that going for him.
Doorman is next on the list
Doorman had the amazing ability to press himself up against a wall and then have someone walk through him to get into the next room.
Yes…that is it.
The female entry in the Great Lakes Avengers was Big Bertha
Her power was to become extraordinarily obese at will. When super obese, she was basically a female Blob. She had super strength and durability. The weird thing was, she was also a super model. Where all the excess fat came from was a mystery, but how she got thin again wasn’t…Big Bertha simply headed to the bathroom and vomited until she was back to her model form. Yikes.
I think I am just going to leave it at that…a four-way tie.
If you would like to let me know who your least favourite super hero is, please leave a comment below.
Have a super weekend.
Thanks for reading.